STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
