it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
