I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
