Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize