i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
