idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
