It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
