Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
