just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
