guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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