god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Just cropdusted the office
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
