how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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