Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Randomize
