the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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