I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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