i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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