You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Come on in and take your pants off
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