A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
