you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
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