The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize