let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
