it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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