I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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