i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
