so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
