guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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