please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Operation Purity has been aborted
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
