Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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