I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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