How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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