Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize