I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize