May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize