So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Randomize
