who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
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