Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
