I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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