i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
