Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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