did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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