we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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