Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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