real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Randomize
