He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
