it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
