Me too!
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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