He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
