So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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