Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
