She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
